Homestead Survival

slice of life with combat thrown in am enjoying the story  don't see many like this am looking forward to seeing were it goes 

Many thanks for the chapters 

slice of life with combat thrown in am enjoying the story  don't see many like this am looking forward to seeing were it goes 

Many thanks for the chapters

I would recomend this story to the people that like Slow burn apocalypse with very light LitRPD components. Main focus of the story is interaction between two MC. If you like when you can see stats going up and such I dont think this story is for you because as I said earlier main focus of this story Is interaction between two MC which this story makes really great and it is somthing new ( at least for me).

Thanks for writting the Story 

Overall, very enjoyable story with a not too self-serious tone. It focuses on the two main characters character, with occasional perspective switching between them, them together, or to other side characters. The perspective changes are not annoying and I found myself favoring both characters equally as opposed to preferring the perspective of just one. Likely due to how the support of told. Like I said at the beginning, fun story, I enjoyed it, you’ll probably enjoy it.

Honestly, the best thing about this so far is that the main characters are intrigueing, non stupid, and thoughtful. It's a breath of fresh air in this genre, which is normally filled with stupid, one track minded goobers who don't think their way out of problems. Which is what your pair has done in more then one way. As long as this continues in this vein, it will be a contender for one of the best!

2 criticisms: the spelling it pretty bad with a dozen mistakes per chapter.  And, occasional survival details are skipped.

But, its a good story.  2 MCs out hiking when the System arrives, the world gets expanded by X100, and now they are 1000 miles from anyone else.  Some survival, some monsters & aliens (cute), and much dealing with the 1 other person they have to rely on for survival.  Some interesting character classes.  And the System bricked technology, so get good fantasy style.  Also a POV of the president a couple of times.  With all of the new space on Earth, more than humans have come to live here.  How will we keep Earth ours, and join the wider galaxy?

This is good now, and could be great with a 2nd editing pass.  Unfortunately, I think there is some writing competition going on forcing many new chapters at the expense of a good edit.

Well written with fun system dynamics. This is a bit like the system apocalypse in terms of how progression is made, with a greater focus on kingdom building/settlement development.  

Multiple races with not all of them being automatically hostile. The duo is not just quick to make it work but have good synergies together. They have fun linked titles which makes it fun because when one party gets stronger the other gets some benefits too. 

Although I've enjoyed the main premise so far where the characters Julia and Theo struggle to find their place in this new reality and are basically building a log cabin with unseasoned wood and now are being directed by an illiterate system to "go slay them monsters!". I cannot keep going with all these typos and grammatical mistakes. The very premise of the story is at risk of being debatable due to poor spelling by the author.

I really like the characters so far. The concept is really cool, too. The perspective switches also add another layer of detail which I really appreciate. The concept of the System has been used many times but this time it's sort of different. But still, I hope the author adds his own, unique take on the System concept to make it vary. Also, work on grammar and spelling mistakes. There are a lot of simple mistakes, so take time to review and tweak before publishing. Overall, amazing concept, structure, and story. I'll continue reading.

First things first:

the FMC casts magic that permanently bonds the MMC to her without the consent of the MMC.

the impetus for this non consensual forced magic bonding? Being attacked by something.

but then they are never attacked by creatures like that again in their local area.

so the attack is only there to justify the use of the bond magic to make the story “work” so the strangers will have this bond between them when they really aren’t that close to each other at all, because that’s the main story theme.

this would be less alarming if they ever saw another hostile creature again in the local area that the first hostile creature was in to necessitate the use of the bond magic without consent. But nothing ever attacks again, which makes the hostile creature a very contrived plot element to justify the forced bond.

second things second:

there are litrpg elements to the story, but they are poorly designed, and have no consistent logic within the story after they have been established.

there is a constitution stat, but no hp.

the MMC gains bonuses for defending the FMC, and there is a very complex interaction between them that makes them overpowered in combat. But there are no numbers to make it make sense.

The MMC is apparently able to tank 280 hits in 10 seconds from 8 creatures that are equal levels to the MMC minus a few stats earned from titles.

The hand wavey symbiotic combination of their skills includes damage reduction. But it still seems unbelievable that the MMC can tank 280 hits in ten seconds without a care in the world.

even if the damage reduction reduced each attack to 1 HP worth of damage, that’s still 280 HP worth of damage that he basically absorbs and it doesn’t affect him at all. And without HP or damage included in the litrpg part of the story, there’s no way to know if he is even in trouble or not.

what makes this worse is that the MMC and FMC act like pacifists and are afraid of getting into any fights while exploring for a few chapters in a row, then in the next chapter the MMC is suddenly a golden god who can take hits like this with no mention of any consideration for anything else.



for a story involving this many litrpg and system apocalypse elements, it’s very unbelievable that the rest of it is not thought out or presented in a logical way that works within the system. When a story brings in these elements in any size way, big or small, then the actions of characters and combat has to be consistent with the logic presented within the story. When the actions of the story don’t match the previously established elements of the system or character stats, it breaks suspension of disbelief.

The MC’s talk about survival priority’s and then ignore them. They mention water being important, and then don’t lift a finger to look or find water.

ive complained enough, and hopefully these glaring issues are sufficient to explain each star taken away, but here are some positives:

the story is cute. The MMC and FMC are a cute couple, and them growing into a family in the sense of the system is a great plot.

the synergy of their skills once they are bonded are great.

the other characters in the world, that the MC’s meet or that are exposed in POV changes are interesting and cool.

the initial system apocalypse is cool.



back to complaining for a summary:

1: don’t use a hostile monster in the area as an excuse for non consensual bond magic and then never show another hostile monster in the area again. If there was one there at the start to make the bond happen, then there should be regular sightings and attacks of more of the same or other monsters in the area.

2. if you are building a world with a system and litrpg stats and skills, it has to be consistent, well thought out, and the future interactions with skills and stats needs to be logical based on what you’ve already shown the reader. Combat needs to be believable, and the combat here is not believable, and the plot hand waving of their bond synergy is not sufficient to explain how the MC’s operate in combat later on.

3: spelling and editing is a must. There. are. so. Many. Spelling. Errors. sometimes system labeled things aren’t consistent within the system elements of the writing. If a system box pops up with “rune circle” in the title of the box, it doesn’t make sense for the flavor text of that system box to use “rune ring”. The system elements should have unified usage of terms. When using these litrpg elements there needs to be internal consistency.